Disappearing Romance
by Troumvirate
Summary: When both Ron and Shego mysteriously disappear from Kim's life she is left wondering/wandering what to do. But what happens when they both return?


Kim was lonely. The two most important people in her life had mysteriously gone missing. One day she and Ron got into an argument involving Josh Mankey so he ran away. She didn't know it at the time but he had run to the Yamanouchi ninja school in Japan in order to better himself. While there he rekindled his friendship with Yori who totally has a chick boner for him but won't get any because he only wants Kim. That's why he's there in the first place, because he wants to better himself so that he's worthy of Kim. Once he learns how to be better at martial arts than her and show up out of nowhere to save her life while she's doing a solo mission she will finally see him for the badass that he is.

Yori was sad because the Chosen One wasn't into her. So she had to settle for Hirotaka instead. He's a perfectly standup kind of dude too. He could have banged the entire female population at Middleton High but didn't because he has too much honor. So Yori won't be at risk of catching any STDs because of it. Meanwhile Fukushima goes around calling everyone a "gaijin" like it's supposed to be this big insult. No wonder Yori doesn't want him. If the best he can do is say that Ron is a gaijin then there's not much hope for him as a love interest.

Meanwhile Shego too had mysteriously vanished. She didn't really have a reason to, considering that she's employed by Dr. Drakken. One would imagine that working for him pays well, at the very least in the form of plunder. But no, she decided to run away in order to do something. But all of this serves a purpose.

One day Kim was doing homework when she heard something outside of her window. She stood up and looked outside.

"Who's there?"

She saw a shadowy figure in the tree next to her house.

"Kimmie, it's me," the figure said. "I've wandered all around the world trying to find meaning for my life. And I realized that that meaning is you."

Kim was floored by the meaningful impact of the figure's words. She could only think of one person.

"Ron?"

"How could you think this is Ron? My voice is extremely feminine."

"...So this is Ron then?"

The figure groaned and revealed itself to be none other than Shego.

"Shego! I have no idea! Super special awesome plot twist!" Kim gasped.

Not knowing how to feel about the revelation, Kim thought about the meaning the words had. She had never thought about being a lesbian before. But since Shego had disappeared from her life for months and had now come back she just now realized that she had a deep longing for the woman. A longing that could only be fulfilled by being with her romantically since they're both so much alike.

"We're totally not magnets," she thought aloud. "It will work."

So Shego leapt into her room and grabbed Kim in her arms. But just as she was about to kiss her there was another voice.

"Kim!"

The two women looked outside to see a figure standing on the ground. The lighting revealed it to be a person clad in a black ninja outfit.

"Who are you?"

"I am your sun and your moon and your stars," the voice said as he jumped from the ground onto the ledge of Kim's window. He took off his mask to reveal his blonde hair and freckled face.

"Ron!" Kim said.

"I've been training and meditating for months with one goal in mind. To be your boyfriend. I've mastered a magical sword and ignored a totally fine Japanese chick so that I could see you this day. Kim, will you do me the honor of being my boyfriend-free girlfriend from this day forward?"

The tight ninja outfit revealed that Ron had a swimmer's body. And like most people here I have no idea what a swimmer's body even is. I've just seen it used to describe Ron so much that whenever he gets in shape he gets a swimmer's body. It's like someone used it once, and someone copied him, and then someone copied them, so on so forth. And did you ever wonder about how much the word 'incredulously' is used in this fandom? Usually it's Kim staring at Ron incredulously after saying something dumb. I can't go through most stories with a decent word count without seeing it. Same thing as the swimmer's body. Get some originality, numbnuts. And what's with people using the word "wonder" interchangeably with "wander"? Seriously, I cannot begin to count the number of stories I've seen where I've seen someone say that a character was wondering around rather than wandering.

Kim looked over at Shego and then Ron.

"Why did you both have to leave Middleton for so many months? Since I haven't seen either of you for so long you're both so attractive to me right now! How am I supposed to decide between you two?"

Shego and Ron shared a look. They knew the answer.

"KimRonGo," they said at the same time.

"What?"

"That's how you please both of your fantasies," Shego explained. "If you're too lazy to pick one of us you can just have us in a three-way relationship. Who cares about how much it doesn't make sense. You'll be very popular if you choose both of us."

"Oh. Okay then."

So Kim, Ron and Shego all got it on that night. Then later on some other chicks turned up and it became a harem. But Kim and Shego were always Ron's two top bitches. The others were expendable.

To be continued?


End file.
